Stitch Head

Author: Guy Bass

Illustrator: Pete Williamson

This is as grotty and grub-infested a book as you will ever find – gloriously, wonderfully, hideously awful. Amongst a castle full of half-baked, not-quite-terrifying, fearful monsters (created by the positively mad Professor) lives an almost-alive, not-ghost of a boy called Stitch Head.

I like mad things. The madder, the better.

This monstrosity of a book was concocted (or as some like to call it, ‘published’) by Stripes in 2011 and really I am rather horrified with myself for not having read it sooner. What a gleefully gruesome book I’ve been missing out on. I urge you to not make the same mistake as me and get to know this assortment of creatures as soon as you possibly can.

The only slight positive to waiting this long is, there’s now a whole series for me to enjoy. So, I’m off to find a hot air balloon to try and fool (I mean tempt!) a six-book-set from the shadows and then lock myself in a dastardly dungeon to read them all in one go – as punishment of course!

Stitch Head was the professor’s first creation and, much to his dismay, has long since been forgotten. Condemned to the lost memories of his master’s mad-mind, Stitch Head has forced himself to exist in the shadows of the castle – only daring to creep out when a creation is in need of ghostly assistance. That is… until… Creature is brought to almost-life (under a full moon no less) and Fulbert Freakfinder comes knocking on the great door. What ensues is a terrifically spooky tale of catastrophe, very long and perilous ladders, friendship and kidnap!

Never a more grotesquely horrid, hideously grim or freakishly spooky story have I ever read. This is absolutely great for children aged 8+ and will definitely appeal to those who don’t necessarily identify as ‘readers’ or say that ‘books are boring’. If they’re not sure, just shown them a few of the freakishly good illustrations and tell them it’s…

“… the most mind-blowin’, stomach-churnin’, trouser-messin’…” book on Earth!!

As an aside, in homage to the great Professor Erasmus – who dedicates his life to the creation of monstrously wonderful beings from second-hand parts and stuck-together bits – this review may have stolen a few particularly marvellous words and phrases from the exceptional writing of the book. It felt the best way to give you a flavour of the “unknowable horror of an unnaturally” good read.